Northern Colorado Intimate Portraits | Lady S
I have battled with self-image for as long as I can remember. There have always been different reasons behind it, I can say that I have never “loved” my body. I am getting there, taking care of myself and learning to have grace with myself. I used to think only a narcissist would or could love their bodies or images. I have matured and realize a healthy person can do this, too. They can love their bodies, their image and their flaws that make them uniquely beautiful. To get to this point, I had to learn to overcome a hate I had for my body.
A little over a decade ago I was diagnosed with MS. This diagnosis and the realities that came with that led me to hate my body. I probably hated my body for different reasons the many of you. I hate that it doesn’t listen to my brain or cooperate with what I want it to do. I hate the fact that I never know what condition my legs will be in when I wake up in the morning. I hated the fact that I had to take medications that made me gain weight, a lot of weight at times.
What many do not know is I’ve also battled through some depression with this diagnosis. I left the job I loved and was unable to do many things I thought I could do. Learning to love myself again has been a voyage.
Something I never thought I would ever do was boudoir photos. A few years ago a friend of mine had some photos with Nicole done and invited me to her group on Facebook. For years I looked at the photos with envy. I longed for that confidence; I wished I could pose like they did, I wished I look like they did. During these years of stalking her photographs through Facebook and Instagram, I realized a lot of the beauty was through her eyes and it really wasn’t what was at the end of the lens, other than the fact that those women had confidence. I wanted to find that confidence in myself. The journey has been long & it’s not near being over.
I finally took the plunge; I scheduled my own Tushy Tuesday photo shoot. I was nervous, wanted to diet or exercise and be perfect for the photo shoot. I didn’t do these things and went ahead with the shoot. I loved every minute of it. Nicole is amazing! I felt like I’ve known her for years after following her for so long through Facebook and Instagram. She made me feel so comfortable and beautiful. I loved the entire experience. I’ve now had multiple session with Lilac & Fern and each one is incredible!
I now realize that THIS is a huge confidence booster! I think EVERY woman should experience something like this!! I am proud of each and every photo Nicole captured. I get more pumped up before shoots with anticipation rather than nerves. I get just as excited for the photo reviews now as I did for my first one.
Lingerie: Client’s own (Salua from Studio Déshabillée)
